Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping

So I’ve seen not one but two to three different Beyonce’ singalong options pop up at the Alamo Drafthouse in the past month alone! And just in case you’ve never been to or heard of Austin, TX before, the Drafthouse is an anomalous movie theater chain that allows you the opportunity to eat full meals and drink adult beverages during their shows. They also put on special events like these so that gay men and fangirls alike can come together in one place and safely celebrate their love for divas, prosecco, and Marky Mark.

Well the reason I bring this up is if they had this kind of stuff around back when boy bands were actually cool then I would've been there for every single Bell Biv Devoe and Another Bad Creation singalong that was available. Now I would’ve also included Boys II Men in this list but looking back those dudes were never cool. The coolest thing they ever did was have Lisa Bonet’ and the black girl from Saved by the Bell in the same video together. And while that is unbelievably fresh, none of them had the game that was required to tag either one of those beauties even with all of their money and fame. But moving on, who wouldn’t want to sing Poison and Iesha at the top of their lungs while eating chili dogs and drinking mimosas? And yes I intentionally made that sound as gay as humanely possible because no matter how manly I try and make this alternative to a Beyonce’ singalong sound, it’s still extremely odd and creepy for a straight male to want to go to a dark theater and sing songs written by 12 year old boys.

But anyway, Andy Samberg made a name for himself on SNL by spoofing these cheesy boybands and the ridiculously over the top hip hop videos that had for whatever reason become the norm at the time. I’m on a Boat has become something of a legend at this point and his video with Natalie Portman made me want to instantly propose to her or the closest look-alike of hers I could find in the mosh pit of a Blink 182 concert (I assume that’s the kind of music she likes). I could never get enough of those silly skits of his and this is why I found myself a little excited about his latest movie Popstar.

Well the first 20-30 minutes of it certainly delivered as you had Samberg in full on popstar mode with his Kanye esque attitude and his absurd lyrics about donkey dances and ball licking. And what nearly had me in tears was his song Do it to Me Like Bin Laden in which the song ended with him saying "you told me to terrorize that pu$$y". That crown jewel of a line alone made me feel as though I had already received my monies worth but there was this fear that was starting to creep in that there wasn’t going to be much else to the film. Was it simply going to be 90 minutes of SNL skits? Thankfully no!

Samberg actually takes you through the rise and fall of a pop icon who initially gained his stardom from being a part of the influential hip hop group The Style Boyz; which included two other white guys, Jorma Taccone (the DJ) and Akiva Schaffer (the lyricist). Well just like Beyonce’, his star shined a little bit brighter than that of his mates, so he broke off and saw instant success with the release of his first album. But once the success got to his head, he made a series of mistakes that ultimately led to his downfall.

Thankfully though these mistakes were displayed in the most hilarious way possible. Samberg smartly and somewhat discretely pokes fun at some of the game’s biggest stars as well as some of their past failures. There’s the fact that he has an enormous entourage that consists entirely of yes men, which of course leads to some quality interactions (MC Hammer). He also resorts to odd gimmicks to try and boost his popularity like having his DJ wear a giant cube on his head that sounds like a foghorn (Deadmau5, Garth Brooks-Chris Gaines, and alternative Sheryl Crow). And then he releases a completely irrelevant song about gay marriage while at the same time trying his hardest to convince everyone how straight he is in his video. I think you’re smart enough to figure out who he’s making a reference to there.

All in all I found this to be a thoroughly enjoyable film and it certainly was a more than suitable alternative to seeing Teenage Mutant Ninja Scrubs. I give Popstar a rating of FRESH!

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