How do I get myself prepared for FFF Fest you ask? Well I’m
going to pretend like you asked anyway; I dress up as DMC from Run DMC and run
around hipster land singing the King of Rock. Sadly everyone told me that I
looked like LL Cool J instead. But I was ok with this as apparently I look like him
on a normal day and girls kept asking me to lick my lips like he always does.
It drove them nuts! Why can’t every day be like this for me??? Well things got
weird as the night went on because after a while dudes started asking me to
lick my lips. Yeah, that wasn’t going to happen. So I proceeded to get really
hammered and my night ended up with me eating fish sticks from Whole Foods and
passing out with my laptop on top of my head! On to the bands…
I will be hungover and a late arrival to day 2 of FFF Fest
mainly due to the fact that you can get a beer and a shot for 10 bucks out
there; damn you and your tasty tequila! But if you are tougher than I am, go
see Unlocking the Truth on the Black Stage at 12:50. My buddy sent me a link to
these three black kids performing their hard core metal on the streets of
Manhattan a few months ago and let me tell you that this is not a gimmick. These
kids can rock out and they are serious about it. Please support them so they
don’t turn into the annoying breakdancing pop lockers you see in Times Square
spinning on their heads with lame wristbands.
Next up is Retox, a punk band that has a lead singer
screaming at the top of his lungs. Consider This Scab Already Picked mixes it
up mid song and turns into a fairly traditional hard rock song showing off their
versatility. But for the most part this is the type of in your face punk that
you want from the Black Stage. They come on at 1:40.
I will probably skip them to head on over to the Blue Stage
so I can check out a band that had one of the best descriptions from a fan that
I have read in a while “When aliens land their UFO’s on Earth and make music, Big
Black Delta happens!” I can’t really beat that but I will add that this is
synth heavy white boy soul music. You can’t help but dance to it, especially when
listening to the hip gyrating inducing beats of Side of the Road and Huggin and
Kissin.
I don’t understand
the Flatbush Zombies; to me they sound like a slightly more serious version of the
awful Afroman. I have previewed them before for SXSW and I still feel the
same way about these clowns. One of them actually has skills and can rap while
the other is simply playing the annoying comic relief sidekick that you find in
a buddy cop movie. They do have some ok beats though and if you’re looking to
get hot boxed, this is definitely the stage for it.
Before they come on the Blue Stage, do yourself a favor and
check out The Underachievers. They are also from Flatbush but they have sicker
beats and even sicker flows. It looks like they really do have the full package
as they bring that New York bravado to the mic but I do have to say that they
look like an 18 year old Snoop in their videos; afraid to make eye contact with
the camera for fear that they’ll end up on Cops or something.
If you like Sonic Youth, then you may want to check out
Thurston Moore’s Chelsea Light Moving as it sounds like a slightly more punk
version of that band. It’s still tinged with the grunge guitars that you would
expect from Thurston though and will certainly have you rocking.
The rest of the day at the festival is really a toss up as
it’s full of disco acts, the overrated Ice-T, and a band that I respect but don’t
really get in Television. I might pop in on the Chromatics for a second but it’s really just
boring disco that’s next of Twin Shadow. I kind of feel like taking the worst
songs off of the new Daft Punk album, and if you’re being honest with yourself
some of those are pretty bad; and listening to those instead. But who knows,
this might be something cool to sway to. They come on at 4:15.
Deerhunter is trippy indie rock that is sometimes a modern take
of psychedelia, sometimes hard rock, and sometimes atmospheric. I can’t ever
really put a finger on them or label them with one specific sound because
honestly each song is different from the other. All I do know is that even if
their music isn’t for you, you will not be bored by their performance.
To end the night, I’ll let you decide between the old punk band the Descendants or if you want to leave dancing, the Simian Mobile Disco. I’ll probably
be passed out under a tree or fighting for space around the barrel full of fire
with the local homeless at this point.
Enjoy.
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