Snow White and the Huntsman

So who would have ever thought that there would be two Snow White movies released within a matter of months of each other and neither Danny Devito or Jonah Hill was cast as one of the dwarfs? Seriously how is that possible? It's not as if they are both that busy right now. And if Hill hadn't lost all of that weight it could have been a passing of the torch from one real life pseudo dwarf to the other. And then Hill could have starred in the new Romancing the Stone starring Seth Rogen and Anna Faris.While I am kidding, there is a very real chance of this actually happening one day followed by me laughing in hysterics as I jump from a burning UT building!!! Please Hollywood, just actually start trying again at some point!

So even I skipped Mirror Mirror, which is saying something. But I was kind of excited to see Huntsmen. The previews made it look like there would be enough action and Charlize Theron in it to make up for the awful casting of Kristen Stewart. And just a quick note on Stewart; while she has never been a good actress or even all that cute, she reaches new lows in this unique take on the classic fairy tale. It's like she is forever stuck in the apathetic rebellious teenager phase that most of us get over by age 17. Or some of us make a career out of, see Cobain ( I kid, I kid, I love Kurt). But Snow White is supposed to be the most beautiful woman on Earth, not some detached brat that looks awkward when they smile and has an A cup. I really dont hate Stewart; I cant blame her for playing the game of Hollywood by riding her undserved fame all the way to the bank. It's just this movie could have been a thousand times better with an attrative young actress who can actually act. HBO has no problems finding young talented bruenettes, why couldnt this studio do the same? It's just hard to believe that the Huntsman (Hemsworth), the seven dwarves, and an entire nation would change their ways and risk his lives for this basically invisible character. Hemsworth does what he can for the role and does a decent job of destroying warriors made of black glass. And Theron is as beautiful as ever and delivers a commanding performance. Some would say she over acted a bit, but having been around a few crazy women in my time, I'd say she nailed the crazy evil witch. And she even had a brother who for some reason looked like an albino drummer for The Monkees.I wont waste your time explaining the plot. It's basically Theron wanting to stay the young, beautiful, and evil queen forever and there is only one threat to her plan and that's the new most beautiful woman in the land, Snow White. So she makes every attempt possible to kill her. And for some reason the Huntsman and the dwarfs fall for her beauty and "personality" and decide to help Snow White take down the queen. That's essentially it.

So for the most part, the story was good, the acting was good, and the fx were awesome. Some pretty cool visuals throughout and the glass shattering warriors made up for the lack of blood. It's just that Stewart's acting makes this fairy tale even more unbelievable and takes you right out of the experience. While this movie isnt completely awful, I will still give it a rating of really WEAK.